Summary: "It isn't polite to ask a guy his age," Jack told the Doctor.
Notes: I might still turn this into a fic someday, but for now, it's just a little snapshot of a meeting between Jack and the Doctor that I wrote to make myself feel better.
"It isn't polite to ask a guy his age," Jack told the Doctor, when they met in a little bar in the year 4,003, somewhere on the opposite side of the galaxy from Earth.
The Doctor crossed his arms and stared him down. "I want to know if we should even be talking, is all. You seem to be everywhere these days. I shudder to think how many timelines we've crossed by this point."
Jack grinned. "I do get around, don't I?"
"Jack," the Doctor said, in that way he had of saying Jack's name, that way that still worked when it came to getting Jack to answer, even after everything.
"A couple million or something," Jack said finally. "I don't know. I got tired of keeping track."
"But--" the Doctor looked stricken. He shook his head. "That's just not possible."
"What are you talking about?" Jack asked, looking genuinely bewildered.
"Well," the Doctor said, pushing his glasses up his nose. "You said, I mean, you told us, they used to call you the Face of Boe. Said you grew up on the Boeshieng Peninsula--"
Jack gave him a blinding grin. "Oh, that," he said. "You believed that?"
"I didn't grow up on the Boeshieng Peninsula, though I absolutely could have been their poster boy if I had." Jack moved along the wall, looking thoughtful. "Come to think of it, I don't think there even is a Boeshieng Peninsula, and believe me, I've been almost everywhere--"
"But you said you still aged! Grey hair, you said!"
Jack laughed. "Well, mind you, I did start to notice some crow's feet around my 1,000,000, is it that obvious? And I think the laugh lines give me extra charm, if anything."
Realization hit the Doctor at about the time Jack started laughing again. "You were only screwing with us!"
Jack turned away, still wearing that grin. "Rose may have mentioned your encounters with the Face of Boe. I've met him a couple of times myself. Charming fellow, really, and if you look past the fact that he's a giant face floating in a jar, I can totally see why you bought into that."
The Doctor crossed his arms again. "So you're not the Face of Boe, then?"
"Last time I saw him," Jack said, "the Face of Boe was vacationing in the New Bahamas on New Earth, with some crazy cat called Novice Hame. They even stuck a big pink umbrella in his jar, so he'd be festive. I'm sure I have pictures somewhere."
"You're screwing with me again, aren't you?" the Doctor asked.
Jack laughed. "About the pictures? Yes. The umbrella? Maybe. The rest is all true, I swear it."